I’m 32, my wife is 31. We have been married for five years and have a four-year-old child. We argue sometimes, but my wife says we are a happy family.
I got a message from a friend of my wife last month, saying my wife was having an affair with her husband. I totally collapsed. I was told that the other guy started texting my wife when she and I were dating.
My wife didn’t even reply when I brought it up as she hated it.
That guy kept texting my wife even after we got married, but she remained silent. I even warned that guy not to text my wife anymore. But for some reason my wife video called with that guy last year when she was near his place to ask him for directions.
The guy’s wife was there too, so she blamed my wife for flirting with her husband, and the friendship between her and my wife ended.
My wife says the guy chased her to say sorry for making her misunderstand him and asked for her forgiveness earlier this year. My wife agreed, and they started talking more frequently after that. What had to come came, and they started having an affair.
“He texted me, sent me photos of him, bragged about women falling for him,” my wife said.
“He started flirting with me, and I was thinking that I would collect the evidence to send to my old friend to make her mad. I don’t know why but I agreed when he invited me to a hotel, saying that he would show me videos of him and other women.”
I chose to forgive her after listening to her story, but I don’t believe her reasoning. I can’t think of my wife as such a naive woman, and I wonder if it really has to do with that old friend of hers.
I read the messages my wife and that guy exchanged before the day I found out about the affair, and there was no video or anything related, just them flirting with each other.
I think if my wife fell for that guy, she would have done so years ago. Why did she only fall for him now, after such a long time disliking him?
I don’t want to break up with my wife, but I wonder why she behaves like this. Can you give me some suggestions?
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