My friend feels uncomfortable when I ask for $400 he borrowed 5 years ago

You might lose a friend if you do not lend them money, but you will lose both if you do. That is exactly what I have experienced after letting a close friend borrow money five years ago. He needed the money to buy holiday gifts for his family as he was facing financial difficulties.

Since we had been close friends for years and trusted each other, and the amount was not too large given my income, I did not think twice and lent them the money. My friend promised to repay me right after the holiday.

But as time went by, I did not hear from them regarding the repayment. Even when I proactively called to check on the situation, they did not pick up my calls. Worried, I decided to visit his home to find out. When I arrived, my friend said everything was fine but his phone was broken so he could not answer calls.

He also confessed that he was broke but promised to pay me back in full the following month. Of course, I believed him and gave him some time. Of course, he did not keep his promise, so I went to his house again to collect the debt.

This time, he told me he was struggling financially. Assuming he was genuinely in trouble, I decided to let him off the hook for another year since I did not have any urgent needs myself. I also mentioned that I would increase the debt to VND15 million if he failed to repay me after one year. My friend agreed immediately and thanked me profusely.

The deadline came and I was determined to reclaim my money. Seeing my insistence and unwillingness to delay any further, my friend changed his tune and told me in annoyance: “That is such a small amount of money, I will repay you when I can.”

At that point, I could no longer tolerate his attitude and firmly declared, “Fine, you may or may not repay the money, but our friendship is definitely over.”

I then stood up and left, which prompted him to apologize and ask for another delay. This time, I flatly refused and accepted that I had lost both the money and a friend.

Should I have done things differently?

Reader Quoc Khanh

*This opinion was translated into English with the assistance of AI. Readers’ views are personal and do not necessarily match VnExpress’ viewpoints.