Monday , July 22 2024

I don’t know when my boyfriend can afford a house for us


I have been thinking about breaking up with my boyfriend lately so that he does not have to work hard to try to afford a house for us anymore.

We started dating half a year ago. We have talked about the future we want: both of us want to live together in our own house instead of a rented house. But since my boyfriend does not receive financial support from his parents, he is struggling to raise his income, which makes him often work until 2-3 a.m.

He is also very stressed about saving and earning more money to afford our own house without relying on his parents’ support.

However, I think part of the problem is because I have never met my boyfriend’s parents even via video call, let alone in person. When his parents call while I’m with him, he avoids letting me speak to them.

Meanwhile, I have been more comfortable with introducing him to my parents, and my parents said they supported our relationship and our future plan.

I know that people often carefully consider before introducing a partner to their parents, but I feel really hurt because of how he acts. My intuition tells me it’s not that his parents are unwilling to support him financially, but rather that they have never met me, so they do not know how I look, whether I am a decent person or not, and they thus fear he might get scammed by me. I think if my boyfriend were to introduce me to his parents, they might change their minds.

However, I cannot convince my boyfriend to let me meet his parents. I love him, and I know he really loves me too, since he accepts to stay with me in my hometown instead of relocating to Hanoi or Ho Chi Minh City, where he can find more opportunities to earn higher salaries.

But I’m unsure how long it will take to save enough for a house if he persists in his approach. I do not want him to have a hard life because of me either.

Should I break up with him to let both him and me not be tired anymore?

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